On Fridays… We Avoid The Internet

Friday’s are clearly the best day of the week if you take out Tuesday and the tacos it usually brings. The work week ends, you can stay up later if you want to drink till your hungover you now can do that, and it marks the release of new shows, movies, or episodes. Friday is the gift that keeps on giving, kind of like re-watching Brooklyn 9-9 which I’m currently doing with the Mrs. (her first time). Friday’s are great… until they aren’t.

Listen, I love Friday as much as the next person but man, does it throw a wrench into my internet use. With new episodes of The Mandalorian and WandaVision dropping on Friday, I’ve had to avoid the internet like the plague. Goodbye Twitter and Facebook. Sorry, I refuse to get spoiled. Granted, this should not be a complaint as we all could probably use a little space from the internet. There is nothing more discouraging than waking up on Sunday morning to the iPhone alert showing you your internet usage for the week. Yes, iPhone, I know I’m wasting my life please don’t remind me on my last day of the weekend. I just want to get an egg sandwich and watch The Kitchen with my wife. You’re hurting my feelings. Of course, this reaction is acknowledging the fact we all know to be true. We need to spend less time on the internet. Except when you’re reading my content. Finish reading and then take your time away. I mean, you’re already here so you might as well finish and if you want to fall down a rabbit hole in the I Am Geek archives, I’m not going to stop you. I’m not your iPhone on Sunday morning. I support whatever you decide… as long as you don’t leave.

You don’t fully grasp how much the internet breaks up your day until you can’t use it. Those little moments at work where you just want to take a five-minute mental break to read Tweets that are bashing Ted Cruz. Perhaps a two-minute break to read a quick theory on WandaVision and who Agnes could possibly be (#shamelessplug). And the ever-popular three minutes to watch a trailer to a childhood video game where a man freezes someone’s blood and then stabs him with it! Or… just pictures of cats. All-day. Every day. The internet has so many different uses and not being able to use it in full on Fridays, while preserving the joy of the watching experience, is a struggle.

Sure, I could be doing more work or working more efficiently by not using the internet and that’s all well and good. Yay being responsible! And yes, the lack of internet use helps make me more excited for the show that I’m actively avoiding spoilers for like the plague because every time you attempt to open Twitter the weight of being spoiled comes crashing down upon you with great force. It’s just… I hate it. I hate that we have to live in the fear of constant spoilers because people will literally spoil things as they’re happening at three o’clock in the morning (or twelve o’clock if you’re on the west coast). I wish social media platforms would come up with some sort of block on shows until Monday so people won’t get spoiled. This block could be password protected and once you complete your viewing a code pops up allowing you to open up social media again. This sounds like a lot of work though and can easily be done by muting certain topics but when I do that I often forget to unmute things and then I’m not getting the news I need. A Catch-22 if there ever was one.

I don’t know, I was hoping you guys would commiserate with me. What are your techniques for not being spoiled? Especially if you have to wait a few days before watching? Do you wake up earlier to watch because you live in fear of spoilers or are you a normal person who just doesn’t care? Be sure to sound off in the comments below or throw me a line over on Twitter @iamgeek32. But please no spoilers, as at this moment I have still not watched WandaVision and have yet to be spoiled. I don’t want to have to hunt any of you down… because I will. Ha Ha Ha Ha, I’m kidding… or am I? No, I am…

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